07 August 2012

Write a blog post about checking my motives. Check.

I misplaced my Bible at church on Sunday. (Yes. I am old school regarding my Bible. My Bible is not contained on an electronic device. It’s big. It’s black, bound leather. It has my name engraved in gold on the cover. Aaron gave it to me for our 1st Anniversary – you know, the “Paper Anniversary.” I’m pretty sure that was the one and only anniversary in which we exchanged gifts – especially “traditional” gifts. Except this year. This year I got a house. I’m digressing.)

My initial thought was that our Young Adult Pastor took it. You might find that oddly irrational and conspiratorial. If that’s the case, then you probably haven’t met our Young Adult Pastor. He had “stolen” my cell phone off the table when I was in the bathroom the night before while our staff was out to dinner. I love him dearly.

Upon rediscovering the rational part of my brain, I decided to retrace my steps through the building before firing off an accusatory text to my dear friend, the Young Adult Pastor.

But each retraced step proved fruitless. I could not find my Bible in any of the locations to which I’d travelled.

And panic began to mount. Yes. Panic.

Because I love the Word of God so much that thought of being without my precious, time-worn, highlighted, notes-in-the-margins-scrawled Bible was nearly more than I could bear, right?

Nope. I was worried that someone would find it, see that it was mine (recall the name engraved in gold on the cover), leaf through it, find my “Through-The-Bible-In-One-Year” checklist and see that I was many days behind.

Ugh. Gut check.

“All a person’s ways seem pure to them, but motives are weighed by the LORD.” Proverbs 16:2

Am I reading the Bible in a year out of some misdirected, task-oriented part of my personality (you know – the part that loves calendars, binders and To-Do lists so much that it may or may not add an already completed task to the list just to be able to cross it off).

Today I am praying that God will weigh my motives and that they would be pure not only to me, but also to Him.

By the way, I found my Bible in my husband’s office. The Lead Pastor was the thief (although he denies any recollection of the theft)…not the Young Adult Pastor. But now they are both on my Not-To-Be-Trusted List and will have to work really hard to get crossed off of it. Well, probably not that hard – because I love crossing things off lists.  

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